Good News!

     Had another ultrasound on Thursday.  Our baby is still growing - great news!  The doctor said his heart looks great, no defects or holes, which is a really good sign, plus no signs of external physical defects either.  His right kidney is still having troubles, but his left one seems to be functioning well.  The doctor says the baby's chances of having Trisomy 18 is now down to about 1 % since he is still growing.  Of course, we can't tell how his brain is functioning, but since he is having a lot of hiccups, it's a good sign that he is practicing breathing.  Yay!!
--The mom

Miracles

     Recently we shared with a woman about our possible trisomy child and she told us that her child had a rare disorder called albinism, and is having trouble in school because of her failing vision. Wonder of wonders, we met a young woman last summer with the same disorder, who is also going blind (who, by the way is an amazing young woman--always cheerful and loving despite the fact that she has very poor vision and knows she'll be blind very soon).
     We spoke with the young woman we'd met last summer, and she eagerly asked the name and contact info for the child with albinism so she could help her through her trials. Her mother became an advocate of sorts for children with albinism.
     Isn't it amazing how our life experiences can bless others in so many ways.

Another Normal Appointment

     We had another doctor's appointment today (just the OBGYN, not the specialist stuff), and he seems to be growing well (based on the Doc measuring her belly). According to some info we read, many Trisomy's stop growing on their seventh month, so this news is hopeful.

It's different

     I feel guilty sometimes because this issue isn't always on my mind. There are days that go by when I hardly think about Trisomy 18--I think about our baby, but not the concerns that my wife feels every hour of every day. For her, every kick from the baby is precious, since we don't know if he'll be active for very long once he's born, if at all. This right now, could be his life, the best part of his life. She's able to share that with him (although I know pregnancy isn't just a walk in the park either), while I get a few reminders, mainly when I happen to be feeling her belly and he happens to kick at that time. Is it different for men and women?      (Well, duh!) Of course. We have our different roles and strengths and feelings. This isn't something that is constantly on my mind, and when I do think about the baby, I force myself to think of all the good times we'll share. I love him already, I really do. I'm grateful that my Heavenly Father has given him to us. I hope to live worthy of the blessing.
     So, yes it's different. But different is good too.

Forward with Faith

     We've decided we're going to go forward with faith. We're going to do all we can to prepare for this baby in our home and have faith that all will work out in the Lord's way.
      So we finished two dressers and fixed another, so that we'll have an extra for the newbie. And we put together a changing table we got from a friend. Soon we'll go get diapers and the like so we show we are exercising our faith. It's all we can do, and it's right to do so.

A Man's View

     I'm a man. I'm a creature of few feelings, and those I do have are too hard to get to and usually not worth the effort. But sometimes, even a man feels something. In this case, I feel a lot of things. First of all I feel grateful for the knowledge of Eternal Families, and for a wife with faith enough to make up for my shortcomings. We're praying for all the miracles we can to have a healthy baby, yet we accept God's will. His ways aren't always our ways, but we believe we can gain an understanding of His ways through study, prayer and living with faith and optimism.
     I also feel grateful for supportive friends and family who care enough to ask how we are. If I were in their shoes, I would probably try to avoid the topic, uncomfortable with how to talk about it.  But they show their faith and charity by bringing up the hard topics and offering their optimism and encouragement. Thanks, we love you all. -- the dad

Hard day, better now!

    So, last Monday I had a really bad day. I was given a priesthood blessing the day before telling me that I would be able to "meet and know" my baby. Well, I immediately heard the work "meet", and my heart sank. I understand the word "meet" to mean a short encounter.  I figured the Lord was telling me that my baby was going to die soon after birth.  I started thinking about where I would bury my baby.  I am a planner, which leads me to be pessimistic sometimes.  I didn't know whether to start getting the baby stuff ready (clothes, crib, etc.) or to start looking into funerals. Well, my optimistic husband said to me "don't you understand, you should be relieved - you were just promised that your baby would be alive when you deliver him."  He said " weren't you just mentioning that you were worried that he hasn't been moving very much lately."  He also said "you don't know whether it's going to be a short encounter, or if he will live a long life, but at least you get to meet him."  True, but I still felt hopeless.  I had let Satan put fear and hopelessness into my heart.
    Luckily, I had some family members and friends looking out for me and following the prompting they were given by Heavenly Father.  I am so grateful that they followed those prompting to talk to me, and were guided in what to tell me.  They told me it is good to be prepared in all things, but keep your hope and faith alive.  My brother in law told me that I better get my baby things out and ready - I need to show faith and hope that things will be okay.  He also shared a few stories with me about his life.  I also realized that if my baby came tomorrow, I wouldn't be all ready or prepared, whether he was normal or if he has problems.  I would have to figured things out as I went.
    So, today I am optimistic.  I again have hope and peace, and I know that whatever happens is what the Lord wants to happen and he knows I and my husband can handle it.  I am going to prepare as best as I can, gain knowledge about all aspects of what can happen, but also keep the hope alive that everything will be okay.  At least at this point I know that I will get to meet my baby and know him, and that now is a huge comfort to me.  -- the mom