Mixed Emotions

Kind of mixed emotions right now. You know that feeling if when you really want to finally know something--like whether you passed an exam, got accepted to a job or made the big part in the next play, but you're nervous about what the answer might be? That's kind of where we are right now.
In two days we'll meet with the geneticist, who started running tests and studying Easton's 'condition' over 4 months ago, to see what he discovered and what his diagnosis is.
On the one hand, it will be such a relief to finally at least know and stop wondering. We've become pretty patient through this Easton Experience, but even then, four months is a long time.
So, what are the possibilities? What could he tell us? There are a few possibilities. One being that there is no diagnosis because he doesn't have a 'syndrome'. This would of course be our highet wish, he has been developing well lately and it could be that he's just a little behind but will catch up as he grows.
Another possibility is an obscure syndrome that basically means he'll be a little behind in life and possibly have seizures and some health problems. This is kind if where we're at right now. And even with the possibility of seizures coming back, and some kidney problems and some delayed development, he is still a very happy child. He's always clapping with a big smile on his face. Often he wakes up, claps a few times, then goes back to sleep. I can handle a few health issues and delayed development if at least he's happy. His smile can melt the hardest heart and lights up the room like an atomic bomb.
Another possibility may be harder news, though given the circumstances, isn't too likely. Many syndromes don't have a long life expectancy. I mention this option, not because we think it will come to this, but just to help others know of the thoughts a family goes through when waiting this kind of news.
Probably the worst possibility would be no news. Inconclusive. Often times its better to at least know something, even if it's bad, than know nothing. Although in some ways, by not labeling him, you also aren't limiting him. Not even the sky is the limit if you don't have limits. So this possibility may very well be a blessing in itself.
Either way, and no matter the news, we are so grateful to have Easton in our family. Each of our kids is special, and brings something wonderful into our family. One part of me dies inside every time I think of Easton not being able to experience life like other children, but another part stands in awe at the majesty and power enveloped in that tiny spirit and I applaud along with him over the smallest, yet monumental feats.
And if, by some small chance the results are less than favorable in two days, I will have peace. For I know that through Christ I can do all things.